This Room Will Survive Me
The photograph does not necessarily say what is no longer, but only and for certain what has been.
—Roland Barthes, Camera Lucida
In my resistance to transition from film to digital photography, I discovered a compromise in a corner of my studio closet. An obsolete professional instant camera replete with bellows for effect and manual F64 aperture for long exposures enabled tactility with film, emulsion and the singular print. This process is itself relegated to the past, uniquely suited to my fascination with recognition of the past in the present moment..
In the Spring of 2019 I began photographing myself in long yellow and red rays of seasonal sun near windows and open doorways. I sought light and shadows in passages between rooms of my house and surrounding nature. In a meditative state near room contours where light flooded my body, I counted long estimated exposures to experience and portray the significance of a room in my encounter with interior emotional and psychological space.
So much of early life is lived in rooms of a house and its natural surroundings The architecture itself resonates deeply with the relationships, emotions and words spoken in it over time. This space and time is embodied for the venture into the world outside. The spaces of known architecture are integral to sense of self through time. The flow of life will forever be a rhythm between home and away.
The photograph’s magical facility as witness to time and past reality allows me to see myself continually evolving while staying the same, a ghost of previous selves. In this series I move through new spaces of rooms and surroundings in the visual context and texture of introspection. I recognize, anticipate, and utilize a light beam before it vanishes and learn what I never knew about myself. My intent is that these images set the stage for similar mind and space-time contemplation within the viewer.